Hiding in Tents

Tonight I watched a scary movie...I am hiding in my tent now.

I am super thankful that God provides us safe places. Things that restore us and help us feel strong.

I had a tent that fit over my mattress as a kid. I kept it on there year round. I was always afraid as a kid. It was always safe in my tent. If I couldn't see something. It didn't exist and therefore could not get me.

Sometimes I wish I could still be in a tent. But I suppose part of God's beauty to me is that He wants me so desperately He will not let me remain hidden. I am a small child, constantly jumping from one hiding space to the next. God is playing seek.

I promised to share my journey. Well, journeys are not always so scenic. I suppose if asked I would have to say I am going down hill. I hate hiking down hill. As much as hiking uphill sucks it feels rewarding, downhill just is downright awkward. Your feet twist and stumble and you feel kinda like your legs are going to fall out and you will fall flat on your face. But going downhill is just as much a part of the journey as going uphill or on the flat parts of trails.

My heart is heavy. I've never known the urgency and importance in communication and honesty as I know it now. Every fiber of my being screams for it. Desires it. And will fight for it.

Where am I? Where are my friends. We are on a mountain top. And we made it rain and that rain caused clouds that are getting in the way of the beautiful view that God wants us to see and love and experience. The view is there. God desperately wants us to have it and cherish it. But our life is out of balance. It has called for a new way of life.

God has called us to be new wine. I see it, I can feel it and taste it...but we are trying to remain in old wine skins. God wants us to be new wine and in new wine skins.

Oh please pray for me, pray for my Family.

I do not want to wish for something new until the old has been conquered.

I wonder if this is the time where all my journeying returns back to whether I will continue on...alone or not. I want to be alone in God and with others in God. I am thankful to be here. I am not afraid, but I am desperate to not lose what is abundant and right.

Tents...in bed...collapsing. God and I get to laugh together. It's a lot of fun!

Try it.